How to make 2020 your best year? The short answer … be your best self. Make YOU better and build on that. Your life will positively change as if by some kind of magic or ‘miracle’ … no matter your age or personal history. You can make a fresh start anytime you want.
I know this from personal experience. Back in the late 1980’s I felt stressed, depressed and unhappy. This was in spite of the fact that from the outside looking in, I was physically healthy, well-paid and had good relationships with family and friends. The negative feelings and emotions I felt had been long standing from an early age. I was living my life in a kind of quiet desperation and had no clue how to change for the better.
So what was the ‘problem’? … I was the problem! … more accurately the way I represented my life and my world was the problem. My coping skills to improve my emotional state were usually distractions including socializing as much as possible, eating and drinking to excess, watching TV and movies, playing golf, going on holidays and buying new clothes. I even smoked for a while to change my state. I did all these things and I’m not suggesting they are wrong. They just weren’t working for me to feel any better when I wasn’t doing them. Not only that, I would wish my life away to a Friday night and then wish I could stop the clock or slow down time as I felt gut-churning feelings on a Sunday evening at the thought of Monday morning looming.
Any of this sound familiar? Would you like to change the things that don’t serve you? Like me, you can.
Back then, I had no resourceful, empowering and sustainable methods or skills and about zero emotional intelligence. But, I was doing the best I could. I was using all the ‘coping skills’ I had in my repertoire and I’ve since discovered in my work that most people operate in similar ways.
If back during that time, anyone had predicted I would one day be working as a holistic health and life coach, teaching and supporting others to enhance the quality of their lives through classes, seminars and personal appointments, I would have said, “Wrong guy! … your crystal ball is faulty … never going to happen!” Another lesson … Never say never.
So how did these negative feelings and this downward spiral change?
I was in Ireland on business and returned to my hotel room after a day of meetings and the dreaded prospect of more the following day. I felt resentful, uninspired and depressed. Unaware at the time I was unconsciously and successfully producing these familiar feelings and emotions. I was good at feeling bad! I still vividly remember putting my briefcase on the bed and reaching for the remote control to switch on one of my trusted distractions…
Then, the turning point in my life … I began watching what I thought was a commercial. This was no ordinary commercial, it was my first experience of an infomercial. It ran for about 30 minutes and I was transfixed. By the end of it I was so inspired and excited, I picked up the phone, got out my credit card and ordered it. I couldn’t wait for it to come the next week. This was it on audio cassette …
30 Days To Personal Power by Anthony Robbins
This set me on a path of personal development and growth that I really felt ready for.
“When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” ~ Lao Tzu
In my mind the only way was forward and up for me. As I went through the program (yes, in exactly 30 days!) I learned skills, techniques and discovered resources for books, authors and teachers that just kept leading me to more and more. I haven’t stopped since and not only continue to feed my mind, body and spirit but now do what I can to impart and share what I have learned over the last quarter century or so with my personal clients and in my classes and seminars. (PS – This particular Tony Robbins program has been updated and developed over the years and he offers many more. If he is a new name to you, you may want to check out his YouTube channel and website to see if he resonates with you.)
If you are a personal development student like me, you know it is a lifelong process. It’s like nourishment for the body, mind and spirit and is an ongoing process. My study and work on myself has led me to feel much better on a daily basis … much better! I make time and prioritize reading, writing, attending courses, seminars and workshops, working out, cooking and meditating.
By the way, Tony Robbins was once overweight and broke and recalls washing his dishes in his bathtub. He agonized about going to his first ever personal development seminar with Jim Rohn. Two weeks wages at the time for him. The late great Jim Rohn became his mentor and was the catalyst to escalate his life to incredible heights.
So often, I learn from the modern day masters that they were once homeless or destitute or had a near death experience, were born into poverty, were addicted to alcohol or drugs … and still found a path in the form of a teacher, a book or just the desire and perseverance to live a better life. This opportunity is available to all of us. If you’re reading this you have internet access which gives you a wealth of education and inspiration from the very best in the world through YouTube. A university at your fingertips!
I remember listening to another fantastic teacher and leader in his field, Brian Tracy talk about his initial question when interviewing someone for a position in his company. He would ask for some of the titles of books and authors in their personal development library. If their was any hesitation or they didn’t have any, the interview was ended.
To conclude this post, success in life leaves clues. Whatever ‘success’ means to you, you can move toward it right now through intention and action. There is a certain way of thinking and acting that will get you what you want and as Einstein said, “the definition of insanity is to keep doing the same thing and expect different results.” If you are like I was at one time, unhappy, insecure, scared, lonely, depressed and feeling it is hopeless, know it is not permanent … unless you choose it to be. The question is, do you want to live your best life today, next week, this year and beyond … where you are and with what you have? You can, and it’s an inside job. Just start …
“When you’re green you grow, when you’re ripe you rot.” The late great Wayne Dyer
Get in touch to arrange a 15-minute complimentary phone or Zoom call to get any of your questions answered. You may also be interested in my courses, seminars and workshops for your group or organisation. More information here. I’m here to serve and support you any way I can. Just get in touch.